Little Fuzzy Scrotums

 I've never been good at meeting new people, and I'm even worse at starting conversations with them.  I usually say something about the weather, then instantly regret saying anything at all.  But there's one topic I can bring up, in the right company, that I'm always eager to hear people's opinions on.  And that topic?  Castration.

It's calf working season here on Hanna Bros and a few of the other local ranches.  Every ranch has their own style of not only castrating bull calves, but of livestock handling and vaccinating.  When I help out on another ranch, I always try to go with the mindset that I'm going to learn something.  Sometimes I learn how NOT to do things, sometimes I learn new combinations of swear words, and sometimes I learn a better way.  

If you ask most cattlemen why they castrate the way they do, their answer would probably be, "Because that's the way my dad taught me."  And there are, surprisingly, a lot of ways to skin a cat, or, more specifically, cut a scrotum.  Some slice open the sack, some cut off the top, and some use rubber bands.  Some are slow, some are fastidious about cleanliness.  Some go at it like they're killing snakes.  Each way has its merits.  I never realized the variety of methods until I helped some friends works calves a few years ago.  Their castration process was just a little slower than most open-heart surgeries.  They asked if I'd like to cut one and when I castrated in the way I'd been taught they were equally horrified and impressed at the speed it took.  I knew no other way.

Every rancher I know is just trying to do right by their animals.  It's why I like to ask about it.  We are a "Cut off the top of the scrotum" family.  We flip the the fuzzy little scrotum away and hope the dogs don't eat them.  They're worse than hairballs on cats if they eat enough of those.  My niece used to collect them and make little Russian hats for her Barbies.  We pull out one testicle at at time and cut off the little tubes that come out with the nuts. (I should have paid more attention in sex ed.  I'm sure I could Google that, but the ads that would pop us as a result of that internet search?  No way.)  Lastly, we spray on a little antiseptic spray and turn the calf loose.  They're sore for a couple days, and then, with their minds changed from ass to grass, they're back to normal.

So if you ever find yourself in the awkward position of meeting someone new, and that person happens to be a rancher, go ahead, ask.